Logical Conclusion to Heroes

Warning: Spoilers, if you haven’t watched this week’s Heroes yet…

We know that Claire can survive all sorts of devastating physical trauma. She can be smashed, burned, sliced, diced, and julienned without long-lasting consequences. We have observed her to be dead with a sharp stick in her brain. She can apparently recover from any wound as long as she is physically together in one place, e.g. when the stick was removed, she came back to life on the autopsy table.

Using various story arcs, and the stupidest tagline in history (“Save the Cheerleader; save the world” ARRRGH!), they have been leading us toward this climactic battle between brain-stealer Sylar and everyone else.

So, here’s my predicted conclusion:

  • Sylar gets Claire. Rips open her head. Steals her brain. Claire dies (for now).
  • Ensemble chases Sylar for various reasons and eventually recaptures Claire’s Brain (I shudder to recall the Star Trek episode Spock’s Brain).
  • Brain is reinserted into (dead) Claire and [poof] Claire reawakens to applause and eventual deflowerment by legions of football players.

    Alternate Ending:

  • Sylar gets Claire. Rips open her head. Steals her brain. Eats or otherwise processes said brain in a way that does orgasmic things for his superpower. Claire dies (for now).
  • Ensemble chases Sylar for various reasons and eventually recaptures Claire’s Brain in its form as stomach contents of Sylar or as otherwise processed.
  • Brain is dumped in the vicinity of Claire’s vacant skull and [foop] back comes Claire.

    Questions:

  • What does the body of Claire do while the brain isn’t present/operating. I guess she’s got a super fantasmographic immune system. She can have unsafe sex whenever she wants.
  • What does Sylar do with his brain fetish? Seems arbitrary to be eating/processing only brains of superpeople.
  • What are the limits of Claire’s regenerative powers? If we pureed her but kept her all together in a vat, would she recover? How about if we decapitated her and placed her head a smidgeon away from her neck? Is she the ultimate blood and organ donor? No need for anasthetic, even. Hopefully she’s type O Negative. Would transplanted tissue exhibit the same tendencies as her all-together body? Will she ever age now that she can repair any damage? What if we took off her arms and switched them? I can think of endless possibilities with this.
  • That is the end of my ramble. Please, feel free to email NBC and tell them their tagline is awwwwwful…

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